Sexually inappropriate behavior in children
For children just beginning to learn about themselves and their bodies, curiosity, sexual exploration and sexual play “are a natural part of childhood sexual development, and help children not only to learn about their own bodies, but about the social and cultural rules that govern sexual behavior” (nctsn.org).
However, sexually inappropriate behavior in children can be harmful or dangerous, especially if they continue despite the child being told to stop. Some indicators of problems include behaviors that are “clearly beyond the child’s developmental stage (for example, a three-year-old attempting to kiss an adult’s genitals) … [sexual behaviors which] involve threats, force, or aggression … or harmful use of sexual body parts (for example, inserting objects into the rectum or vagina” (nctsn.org).
It is impossible to list every variant of sexually inappropriate behavior in children. However, a good general guideline is that the boundary of inappropriate behavior is crossed when the child becomes overly focused or aggressive. In other words, the “normative behaviors of childhood and adolescence are of concern when they are extensive or suggest preoccupation, or involve others in ways that are not consensual. That is, sexual behaviors in children present a special concern when they appear as prominent features in a child’s life, or when sexual play or behaviors are not welcomed by other children involved in the play. This is the point at which sexually harmful and aggressive behaviors most closely and clearly hinges” (selfhelpmagazine.com).
Such behaviors might indicate that the sexually aggressive child has experienced some form of sexual abuse himself. The term used to describe this phenomenon is that the child is “sexually reactive.” “Sexually reactive children are pre-pubescent boys and girls who have been exposed to, or had contact with, inappropriate sexual activities. The sexually reactive child may engage in a variety of age-inappropriate sexual behaviors as a result of his or her own exposure to sexual experiences, and may begin to act out, or engage in, sexual behaviors or relationships that include excessive sexual play, inappropriate sexual comments or gestures, mutual sexual activity with other children, or sexual molestation and abuse of other children.” (selfhelpmagazine.com)
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